Wednesday, October 1, 2008

SELF CONFIDENCE-Best tool for public speaking

Self-confidence is the opinion set up by oneself that that you can manage a certain situation correctly and in the desired manner. Self-confidence is knowing that you don't lack any of the necessary skills and techniques in order to successfully complete a task. This task can vary from a social activity like being able to approach someone you don't know, to a professional activity like the ability to complete a desired task that your work or your business needs.Speaking in public is nothing but the display of your self confidence.The biggest problem arising out of lack of self confidence is the judgement which one gives to oneself considering all the past experiances and false notions.Self confidence is always attached to a few things like perfectionism,self image,love etc.Below i have classified a few kinds of problems linked to lack of self confidence.Recognizing the cause itself will solve half the problem.After understanding the right cause our objective would be to develop a new mind structure to help you increase your confidence level.
Self-confidence and Inferiority Complex
One very important thing to note here is whether your lack of self-confidence is because of a deeply rooted inferiority complex.The man was suffering from feelings of inferiority and inadequacy; when such feelings control the behavior to that extent, it is then called inferiority complex. The cause of that man’s inferiority complex is deeply rooted in his childhood; when he was a child he was physically weaker than the other kids his age, which lead to them beating him up, taking his lunch and calling him names. Years later, he is now a very reknowned social person, academically very successful and a great basketball player. Yet, the feelings of inferiority are still lingering there.Simply put, inferiority complex is a disorder that develops as a result of feeling inferior when compared to your peers or friends. This can act as a barrier to building self-confidence and so it is essential to deal with it first.
Self-confidence and Commiting Mistakes
Some parents shout at their children as soon as they break something, stain their clothes, forget to do their chores,dirty the house or any other minor mistake. Treating a child in this way results in him thinking that doing something wrong is shameful and that making mistakes makes him different from other perfect people who do not make mistakes. When this child grows up and makes a certain mistake in front in public, like dropping a glass or having something go wrong during a presentation, it appears to him as an embarrassing situation and will cause him to think that he is not up to the standard of other people. These kinds of thoughts will gradually but surely damage his confidence.A parent's role should be building self-confidence in their children by encouraging and supporting them to try new things and not to be afraid of making mistakes. The parent should teach them that, as a human being, error's are unavoidable; so it's best to accept your mistakes without criticizing or labeling yourself.
Self-confidence and Perfectionism
Another great cause for a lack of self-confidence is being a perfectionist. A perfectionist always sets impossible goals and very high standards that he can never meet and this causes his confidence to degrade as he success escapes him again and again. One example of these impossible standards could be "I must never make mistakes if I want to be great at what I do".
Lack of Self-confidence and Assertiveness
A lack of assertiveness in communication can also lead to having less confidence of your abilities. If you are assertive, this will help you feel that you are in control, important and more worthy of respect and attention. Assertiveness is the ability to express yourself and needs without being aggressive; it's also the way of communication that makes you stand up for your rights and never let them go while at the same time avoiding violating others' rights.
Lack of Self-confidence and Poor Self Image
Sometimes the underlying cause for a lack of self-confidence is having a poor self image. An example of this is if you think that you are ugly and so lack confidence whenever you meet new people. In order to know whether or not your lack of self-confidence is rooted in your poor self image; there is a small test that you can do: If you find that you feel more confident wearing your best shirt and much less confident when wearing something else, then your lack of confidence may be a direct result of the poor self image you have of yourself. In that case, fixing your poor mental self image is all what you have to do to restore your self-confidence.If you found a way to convince people that you are confident you will definitely have more fans and you will increase your chance of making someone fall in love with you.
Lack of Self-confidence and Negative Self-talk
Usually, the lack of self confidence is associated with negative self talk; which are the negative phrases and words you keep telling yourself while doing your normal thinking process. Stopping those negative words and phrases and replacing them with positive ones can not only increase your confidence but can help in fixing many of your emotional problems.
Self-confidence and Knowledge
When you know the benefit of something that you do regularly, you will be much more confident talking about it and doing it than if you were just doing it out of habit. Although you shouldn't have to provide an explanation to other people for what you, the power of knowing can still give your self-confidence a big boost.
Self-confidence and Comparing Yourself to Others
Some people have developed the terrible habit of always comparing themselves to others; what's worse is that they choose to compare criteria that almost always puts them at the weak end of the comparison. They ignore all that is great about them and pick just this one thing that they lack and compare it to others. On finding that they are different, they feel less confident about themselves and their abilities. This behavior only results in damaging their already worn self-confidence.
Fear and Lack of Self-confidence
Do you know that fear can also steal some of your self-confidence? If you are afriad of ghosts or of the dark, your subconscious mind will probably be a bit perplexed as to why you think you should feel confident when you find yourself helpless in certain harmless situations like being alone in the dark. The more helpless you feel, the more your self-confidence will erode as a result.You can still be confident even when afraid of something, but facing your fears will make you that much more confident than you already are.

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